Lesson learnt.

Assalammualaikum w.b.t 

Alhamdulillah,segala puji untuk-Nya yang memberiku peluang bernafas sehari lagi di atas muka bumi-Nya.

I am very frustrated. 

line RER tadi ada masalah. untuk balik ke Poissy, I've waited for almost one hour. masa awal-awal tengok info trafik kata ada masalah line A direction Cergy and Poissy, aku dah cuak. how the h*ll I'm going back kalau tak ada train ni? and boom, Isma called and I burst into light tears. 

but the frustration is not as 'grave' as my frustration to discover two women, seorang lebih kurang 60-an seorang lagi lebih kurang 40-an (they are mother and daughter) left in a house, at 430 pm, belum makan tengahari, hanya beberapa keping roti yang masuk ke dalam perut.

astarghfirullah... astarghfirullah....

I dont know why but I am mad to their children/grandchildren... although I know, I can't, I have no right. I'm just an outsider who happens to live around Paris. but I wonder, macam mana organisation, what were they thinking, and what was their plan masa awal-awal plan nak datang sini? kalau dah tahu nak pegi jalan-jalan dengan ibu dan nenek + isteri dan anak-anak sekali, so adapt your plan to all generation.

fine, it was their mother and grandma yang tak nak ikut sebab penat and wanted to stay Paris sementara they all continue the journey to stay 2 nights outside Paris. but have you really talk to us or the host of the accommodation (the host is also not here in Paris coz now doing the umrah) about this?

ada tak ckp betul-betul, 'boleh tolong jaga or tolong tengokkan etc etc'? you dont just leave assuming we're gonna take care of it. if someone really did that, we would organise between us to take care of the household, preparing the meal etc.

sigh. I dont know coz I'm new here. maybe they did tell to the host or maybe there's a miscommunication or misunderstanding the meaning of 'entertaining' or 'take care'... because I have the impression that everyone's a bit lost to be left with two aged women.

I surely dont mind to take care of them, in fact, I'm enjoying their presence. I miss my mom badly. and I miss having grandparents. tiba-tiba ada nenek and ada ibu nak bermanja-manja, siap mengadu takut nak kahwinlah hantaran tinggilah apalah, siapa yang tak suka. but if only I knew about this, I would organise my schedule to properly adapt to the situation. 

tomorrow I'm going to sleep over. but that would be my last time seeing them. coz the next night, I refuse to show up, I don't now how to face their children. evendo i'd love to see nenek and makcik once again before they're off to uk and istanbul, and muhaimin (cicit nenek and cucu makcik) yang sgt manja and very sage, reminds me a lot of kimi, my adorable nephew.

Allah... I really hope, I'm going to take care of mama and ayah baik-baik... coz I think I'm the workaholic type. Allah.... I really hope I wont abandon or ignore my parents, deliberately or not. 

amin.